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Can you find true love a second time around?

Now blissfully happy with his second wife, Pierce Brosnan is living proof that it’s possible to find true love twice

We’re so used to hearing about celebrity couples breaking up, it’s heart warming to hear Love Is All You Need star Pierce Brosnan singing the praises of his “very cool” wife Keely this week.

“She’s the most beautiful woman and someone who has been my North Star for many a day and a year now,” he proudly stated.

What makes their relationship all the more special is that this is Brosnan’s second round of true love.

His first wife, Cassandra Harris, died following a four-year battle with ovarian cancer in 1991, leaving former Bond star Brosnan a widower in his late 30s, with a young son.

The actor admitted he didn’t think he’d find love again, let alone marry.

There’s always hope
This is something thousands of people will be able to relate to. Whether you’re widowed, or single again following divorce or the breakdown of a long-term relationship, being alone – when you thought everything was sorted in the relationship front – can be extremely tough.

At first, it might seem impossible to imagine that you’ll ever move on, or meet somebody special second time round.

“Stories such as Brosnan’s serve as a reminder that love can be found – and found again – at any stage in life,” says Kate Taylor, match.com’s relationship expert.

“If you don’t know any people in your own life who have remarried, or found love again, it might dampen your own belief that it’s a possibility.

“Look outside your own world for inspiration.”

Indeed – Brosnan had been widowed three years before meeting Keely in 1994. Now they’ve been happily married 19 years and had two sons together, so, in Brosnan’s own words: “There’s hope.”

Take your time
The crucial thing, says Kate, is not to put too much pressure on yourself. Allow yourself time to process your feelings before embarking on finding love again.

“Build yourself up first – your first priority should always be to create a wonderful world for yourself, and to maintain it throughout a love affair,” Kate advises. “Great relationships are formed by two complete people joining together, not two halves trying to make a whole.”

Grief and divorce may be very different in their nature but both require a period of coming to terms with your emotions and adapting.

These things can’t be rushed, and there are no ‘right’ or ‘wrongs’ as to how long this takes. “I don’t think any of us should put a timescale on it,” says Kate.

Taking away any internal deadlines removes the urgency and desperation about meeting somebody else, which is an added pressure you simply don’t need.

Staying positive

If you’re looking for inspiration to help you find love a little later in life, Brosnan is just the tip of the iceberg.

While it’s easy to think you’re the only single person in the world, and you’re running out of time, that simply isn’t the case – there will always be countless people in the same boat – people who are a great catch - just like you.

When you’re ready to invite somebody new into your life, surround yourself with support and rope in your friends. If you’re ever in need of a confidence boost or simply want to offload about how your last date went, having somebody to chat to could make the world of difference.

Keep your options open

Brosnan originally met journalist Keely through work – when she interviewed him.

It goes to show when it comes to meeting people, the possibilities are endless.

A trusted friend could help you write a profile, if you’re thinking of giving internet dating a go, or join you on nights out, or at that new dance class to help you get out there again.

Taking a positive approach, and having fun in the process will boost your spirits and your chances of meeting likeminded people.

Avoiding baggage
Most of us have ‘baggage’ of some sort, but if you’re looking for love a second time round, this can be particularly tricky.

This is another reason why not forcing yourself to move on too quickly is so important. When you do meet somebody special, you’ll want to give the relationship as best a chance as possible.

While keeping on board the positive lessons we’ve learnt from previous relationships is a good thing, it’s also important to remember that this is a brand new and different relationship with a different person.

You’ll need a clean slate, in a sense, to allow your own dynamics to grow. Nobody will want to feel they’re living in the shadow of a previous partner, or have simply been chosen to fill an existing mould.

“It’s only fair to a new partner that there is space in your life for them,” says Kate.

Good luck!

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