10 funny chat-up lines put to the test

Will these chat-up lines impress comedian Diane Morgan?
Trying out a funny line is a fabulous way to break the ice with someone who takes your fancy, but make a duff joke and you won’t be able to see each other for all the tumbleweed!
We tried out ten funny chat-up lines on Mock The Week and Phoenix Nights star Diane Morgan to see whether they made her laugh, cry or cringe…

1) Would you like to dance with the greatest dancer in the world? So would I, let’s go to the dance floor together to try and find him.
Diane says: “This wouldn’t work with me as I hate dancing. Plus, dancing with the greatest dancer in the world would only serve to make my dancing look like I was having some sort of fit.”
Score: 5/10

2) Excuse me, I hope you don’t mind me telling you this but I’ve been watching you dancing for a while now and you’re pretty terrible. Let me buy you a drink and we can talk about it.
Diane says: “If he’s been ‘watching me for a while’ he’s well on the way to becoming a stalker. He follows this with an insult to my dancing and the offer of a drink. He’s lucky I don’t hurl the drink in his direction. I imagine this is a line that Simon Cowell would use.”
Score: 4/10

3) I may not be the best looking guy in the room, but I’m the only one talking to you.
Diane says: “Funny, modest and probably true.”
Score: 8/10

4) I lost my phone number, can I borrow yours?
Diane says: “Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha……NO.”
Score: 2/10

5) Do you know what this is? It’s boyfriend material.
Diane says: “Awwwwww! It’s working.”
Score: 9/10

6) Uh, oh. My parents met at a place like this. Let’s get the hell out of here.
Diane says: “Well, as most couples meet at work maybe try flowers and chocolates first, before you hand in your notice.”
Score: 4/10

7) Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
Diane says: “Who is this, the Fonz?!”
Score: 1/10

8) Oh no, do you think you could help me please? Something is wrong with my mobile. It’s just that your number’s not in it.
Diane says: “Nice try.”
Score: 4/10

9) So which one of Girls Aloud are you?
Diane says: “The mouthy ginger one. Every girl likes to hear a man imply she’s dressed like someone from Girls Aloud!”
Score: 6/10

10) So, do you like fat guys with no money?
Diane says: “We have a winner!”
Score: 10/10