While some singles like meeting people at bars and others prefer meeting their dates online first, both types would be doing themselves a favour if they utilised the best of online and offline dating. Both have their own strengths, so putting your eggs in more than one basket is smart and will likely lead you to your ideal match much sooner.
As with everything in life, balance is key when you’re on dating sites, so here are four tips for making sure you’re spending the right energy offline and online.
1. Dedicate Set Times For Online/Offline
If you spend a couple hours a week online dating, try to spend a couple hours a week at parties, bars,classes, meetups, volunteering opportunities, or dating events. Set little goals for yourself such as “I will send messages to five new matches today” or “I will talk to at least two people I don’t know at this class.”
Lots of this relies on you putting yourself out there. Yes, it can be scary, but you’ll feel good about yourself for making an effort. You’re more likely to see dating results if you take matters into your own hands instead of waiting for life to happen to you.
2. Don’t Rely On Just Online/Offline to Talk to Your Dates
Most of us are messaging fanatics and have got to the point where chatting on the phone is a rarity. We’d rather send a thousand texts than spend a minute trying to explain something or share a story. But to make sure you’re really getting to know your date in different ways, you have to mix up how you communicate with one another. Some of us are much more charming in real life – or if the opposite is true, you’ll want to find out as soon as possible!
For more intimate or serious conversations, try to get them on the phone or in person by texting something like “Hey, can I call you tonight? I’d love to hear about your day” or “Hey, let’s meet up and chat about this over coffee. Would be fun to see your face!” For those late-night conversations or flirty check-ins at work, messages work best.
3. If You’re Feeling Burnt Out, Switch It Up
Dating burnout happens, but it’s more preventable if you look for matches in a variety of ways. Some days you just don’t want to get off the sofa and go to the bar. If you’re feeling that way, turn to online dating, where it doesn’t matter if you’re in your jogging bottoms. There are also those days when you just need human interaction. When you’re feeling that way, organise a spontaneous date or head out with your friends somewhere you might bump into someone new.
4. Perfect your profile & find go-to offline dates
When you have a dating app that really works, like Match, don’t spread yourself thinly; it’s better to have a complete profile on the app you’re using, rather than a halfhearted effort in multiple places. You can do the same offline. Not every first date has to be a blow-their-socks-off extravaganza! Find a couple spots which are convenient and have the right atmosphere, and don’t be afraid to get to know your date in a more casual atmosphere – there’s plenty of time to get to know them better later.
Before the internet was invented, singles spent centuries only being able to meet people in “the real world,” so to speak. It makes sense that online dating works, and is so popular — it’s easy, it’s convenient, it’s efficient, and it’s fun. However, it’s a tool that you have to use to enhance your dating experience and the offline part is just as important – remember to balance the two!
Hayley Matthews is editor-in-chief at DatingAdvice.com, a popular site featuring advice from more than 250 dating coaches, matchmakers, and other relationship experts. In addition to expert tips and guides, the site also publishes reviews of the best online dating apps, where Hayley and her team rank Match.com as #1. When Hayley isn’t writing about dating and relationships, she’s listening to The Beatles or watching Harry Potter movies.