5 things that girls don’t actually care about

Women aren’t bothered by this stuff…. men just think they are

Men are easy-going dudes while women are self-loathing neurotics, right? That’s funny, because we were thinking just the same thing about you.
Take your ‘appendage’ for example. (You’re going to carry on reading now, aren’t you?) Or your wallet, or your car. You use these things to judge yourself and your attractiveness to women, and you seem to get ever so upset when you think you don’t measure up. Stop beating yourself up (steady), and read on to discover the stuff that women really don’t give care about.

1. The size of your wallet
Times are tough for a lot of us at the moment, and that has turned money into a hotter dating topic than ever. Many men seem convinced that no woman will ever look at them if they don’t earn a certain amount, or (heaven forbid!) don’t have a job at all. That really isn’t the way that women think – at least not any woman worth her salt.
Women want to date men who are interesting, bright, funny, creative, thoughtful, handsome and good in bed. If those men are gainfully employed it’s definitely a help, partly because it gives him some self-worth and partly because it means that she doesn’t have to worry about losing her savings to a freeloader. But an idiot with money is still an idiot, and women genuinely enjoy their independence. The size of a man’s bank account is of far less importance to women than most men believe.

2. The size of your ‘appendage’

No woman will ever care about the size of a man’s appendage as much as he does, and yet men will worry about size until the day the earth stops spinning.
OK, here’s the science bit. A certain amount of bulk is useful in the sack. It’s how we were made. But once you stray much above average, it makes very little difference and can be counter-productive. (It’s uncomfortable, is what we’re saying.) If you’re really worried about being the best lover in town, do some jaw exercises.

3. How long you can keep going in bed
Just as the length of your apparatus can make things a little uncomfortable for your supposedly grateful sexual partner, so can the length of your activity. Please, don’t outstay your welcome. The bit that you want to devote time to isn’t necessarily what you’d think. If you can learn to read the signs, you may find that your partner wants to be intimate far more often.

4. Your bald spot
We do understand your worries over this one, guys. Waking up to find that you’ve got yet another square inch of scalp must be pretty soul-destroying, especially if it begins when you’re in your 20s or even earlier (see the Royal family for some extreme examples).
But if you wear your male pattern baldness with pride, it really can be rather sexy. When we say “with pride”, we mean “with really really short hair.” A balding bouffant is a sign of a baldy in denial, and it is deeply unattractive. Ladies love a balding buzz cut, so get out the clippers and make like Jason Statham and Vin Diesel.

5. Your car
Oh, so your car cost £20,000, and you’ll be paying it off for the next 10 years?  You fool. See ya later, got a date with a hot guy on a bike.