We asked match.com user Sophie Louise to document her experience of the 3 days free dating trial. Here’s how she found moving her dating game online ..
I have decided to bite the dating bullet and get myself onto dating websites. After ending a long relationship and having a few relationships that didn’t go anywhere, am hoping that internet dating will open up a new avenue of like-minded individuals. Excited to start this new chapter. Trawl through my photos and realise that I don’t have many that are just me on my own. From experience, it’s hard to work out who is the actual person when you upload a group shot – so will avoid those. Settle on a close up shot of me smiling, a full body shot to show my body shape (only fair, whatever your size) a shot of me in running gear (slightly sweaty – look, I am sporty! And I can be make-up free!) and another of me sporting tanned legs (all’s fair in love and war.) Deliberate over whether I should put more glamorous shots on, or actually upload more ‘down to earth’ pics – but friends reassure me that they are fine. I figure – if you are selling a car, you want it to look as good as possible, but also for it to be a realistic portrayal. Same advice applies here. Writing my profile: try to keep it here positive and upbeat about my life (no moans about how I need someone to complete me: I don’t. Even if you feel that, perhaps keep it to yourself) but still conveying the point that I would actually like to have a relationship with someone. Avoid listing all my achievements and shouting from the rooftops about all the worthy things that I have done – yawn! Write it all down and then realise it’s far too long and there are some things that are best left to chat about on a first date. Spend another 20 mins editing it and cutting out unnecessary flannel. Done. Profile is going live… if you want a pair of shoes, you have got to go shoe shopping…! Hope my perfect fit is out there… perhaps my other shoe to make a pair…. OK, enough with the dubious shoe puns. Ad is on.
With baited breath, I check my Match.com app. So exciting to see that people have viewed me! Receive a couple of messages – it’s good when people write a few lines, with perhaps a question that relates to your profile, so that you know that they have read it and taken an interest in your life. I tend to find the ‘hi’ messages a tad lazy, and it’s tempting to just say ‘hi’ back – but I am just too impatient to take so long to build up communication. Worse, I think, are the ‘hi beautiful’ or ‘hi sexy’ mails. The cynical voice inside my head is saying ‘I bet you say that to all the match.com girls.’!! I decide that a good message is friendly (of course, you would think, but I have received a dubious one that was trying to be ‘funny’) fairly short, with a reference to your profile, some information about what they have done recently, ended with a question. I also try to stick to this vague rule of thumb when I am messaging someone else for the first time. Have discovered that that the ‘Daily 6’ is a good way of seeing suitable ‘matches’. Individuals that are thought to be suitable are submitted to you, six per day, and you ‘yes/no/maybe them. Handy as they are local to your area. I ‘yes’ someone and send him a quick message to introduce myself, hoping that he will reply.
No reply from the ‘Daily 6’ man. However, a few messages from other people today. One of them has a similar profile name to me (Beach related) and we seem to have a few shared interests. Plus, he is taller than me – a real bonus. I know, I know, so superficial, but being a much taller than average woman limits my matching possibilities massively. I am sure that there are many females who don’t mind towering over a date, but I am not one of them… and judging by the heights of some of the men that have viewed me, some of them obviously don’t fancy dating a Nicole Kidman when they could have a Kylie. Receiving a few number of ‘winks’ at the moment. I don’t know how I stand on this!? A wink, in my view, should be a precursor to a message – don’t just wink and sit back! Decide to take matters into my own hands and wink back. Ball’s in your court, winker! ‘Cmon, Beach Guy… message me back…. Start your free dating trial today or why not become a match.com blogger.