How to win her over on a first date

Tips to ensure your date gets back in touch
Sometimes first dates can feel like job interviews: a half-hour coffee or speedy drink to suss each other out. If you’re lucky it’s a meal or night out but, either way, the prospect of having to make a good impression on someone in such a short window of time is terrifying. But before you run off scared, peruse these top tips on how to win her over on a first date…

1) Be thoughtful
Everyone remembers a personalised service in business, and the same rule applies to a date. If your date is vegetarian choose a café that does killer falafel, if she’s into sailing, choose a nautical-themed bar for your first drink, or if you know she’s coming from work, suggest meeting her somewhere on her way home. It’ll show you’re tuned in to how she’s thinking, and she’ll appreciate your efforts.

2) Be polite
We know it’s not the Fifties but a bit of chivalry goes a long way. If it feels natural to do so, there’s nothing wrong with holding open doors, helping her with her coat or topping up her wine glass. If you’re subtle about it rather than showy or forceful, she’s bound to be impressed.

3) Be yourself
Don’t be afraid to show some character. You won’t leave a mark if you just tell her things you think she wants to hear. There’s no reason why you can’t bring up topics you feel passionate about or to order a drink or meal which you think says something about you.

4) Be funny
There’s nothing more unattractive than someone who takes themselves too seriously and, moreover, most women love to laugh. Don’t use the date as an opportunity to try out a whole stand-up routine, but a well-timed joke or bit of witty self-deprecation will help the date fly by and leave her looking forward to the next time she can see you.

5) Be generous
Don’t feel you have to splash out on lychee Martinis every time you go on a first date but be as generous as you can within the confines of your budget. This means offering to get in the first round of drinks or coffees, and not quibbling over who ate what if you’re splitting a food bill.

6) Be relaxed
As hard as it sounds, it’s so much easier to get across your personality if you’re feeling relaxed on a date. Help yourself by picking a venue you feel comfortable in, clothes you know make you look great, and a time of day when you know you’ll be on form and when you won’t need to rush off.

7) Be groomed
Make too much effort with your appearance and you might not feel comfortable on a date, but putting in too little will make her remember you for the wrong reasons. So iron your clothes, tidy up your hair and make sure you smell good. Unfortunately, how you look is just as important as what you say.

8) Be prepared
Make sure your phone is charged up, your debit card hasn’t been locked and that you know how to get to and from the venue. You want the experience to be as smooth as possible so a bit of planning goes a long way.

9) Be all ears
Many women complain of feeling like interviewers or counsellors on a first date. Yes, she will want to find out about you, but the conversation needs to be two-way. So make sure you ask plenty of open questions, and show an interest in what she has to say.

10) Be entertaining
Obviously work, family and interests are likely to come up during first date conversations, but don’t be afraid to throw in the odd curveball. Ask her about the worst teacher she ever had or what she would cook if she was on Masterchef. The conversation could take a memorable turn.