Dating tips3 minutes

Signs they’re not the one

Laura, 12 April 2019
Signs they're not the one

Find out if your relationship is destined to last or whether it’s time to throw in the towel.

The bad times outnumber the good
You should feel secure and content in your relationship at least eighty percent of the time. If you can’t remember the last time you actually had fun together without arguing or things getting fraught it could be time to pack your bags.

They constantly put you down
A bit of friendly teasing is cute, but if your other half seems to get their kicks from making you the butt of all their jokes or belittling you in public, alarm bells should definitely be ringing. Putting someone down – especially in front of others – is a power game that you should play no part in.

They refuse to talk things through
All relationships hit rocky patches, but if your partner deals with things by shutting down and giving you the ultimate passive-aggressive silent treatment you’re never going to be able to work through your issues together. It’s time to move on.

Little things get on your nerves
Okay, so it’s annoying when he/she leaves the cap off the toothpaste or forgets to put the milk back in the fridge, but those aren’t deal breakers. It’s when you start to feel irrationally annoyed by silly little things like his hairy toes or her singing in the shower that you know they’re not the one for you.

They take you for granted
Familiarity is a wonderful thing, but not when it’s at the expense of good manners. It’s part of your partner’s job spec to make you feel appreciated and loved. If they’re not upholding their side of the bargain, they don’t deserve to have you.

You disagree about the future
If you’re in continual disagreement about major life choices that lie ahead such as whether or not to start a family together, you need to think carefully about your next move. Hanging around hoping to change their mind is a risky gamble.

They forget important stuff
No matter how busy or stressed your other half is, there’s no excuse for forgetting important things like your birthday, anniversary…or name! It’s a forewarning of further neglect to come.

You can’t stand their friends
The company a person keeps says a lot about them. Feeling uncomfortable or unwelcome around the people he or she holds dear is an early indicator of friction and tension in years to come.

There’s no spark
Cast your mind back to when you first started dating. Were you excited every time you heard from them? And are you now?  Those in lasting relationships still get a rush when their lover sends them a text or gives them a call.  If you no longer do, we seriously doubt they’re the one.

They don’t like your family
If they love you, they need to be accepting of those you hold dear too. If they make snide remarks about your family or behave rudely towards them, it doesn’t bode well for your future happiness together.

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