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How to find the ‘One’ in 2011

Think positive
It’s a brand new year so make a clean start by releasing any negative feelings that have been hindering your search for the one. That means no sulking around the house feeling sorry for yourself and resentful of others who have found love. It’s time to banish all feelings of self-doubt from your mind and start this year with a fresh and positive mindset. So what if everyone’s got someone but you? You’re fun and fabulous and this year you’re taking control of your love life. 

Open your eyes
Mr or Ms Perfect could be right under your nose, but you’re never going to find out if you walk around with your eyes fixed on the ground and your iPod on. This year make a point of walking tall and looking around you. Make eye-contact and smile at that hot guy or girl on your daily commute. Be bold and strike up a conversation. Not every one of these encounters is going to lead to love, but a bit of friendly conversation never hurt anyone and could lead to something more serious…

Open your mind
Be honest. Could the reason you’ve not met anyone up to now be because you’ve made your dating criteria too narrow? Do you have a fixed idea of your ideal partner in your mind and dismiss anyone who doesn’t meet your exact requirements? Remember, love isn’t an exact science. Just because he/she works in finance, has dark hair and likes bowling doesn’t mean you’ll gel. This year take a risk and try dating against type. After all, there’s scientific proof that opposites attract. So open your mind to the possibilities of dating someone much older/younger/with children/from a different country. Cast your net wide and you might be surprised.

Look your best
This year you want to present yourself to strangers in the very best light so it’s time to start eating well, getting plenty of exercise which will enhance your mood as well as keeping you in trim and not scrimping on those trips to the barber/hair dressers. Treat yourself to some new clothes in the January sales too. And if you’re unsure about what to buy, ask for help from an in-store stylist. If you feel good about the way you look, you’ll instantly feel more self-confident about approaching new people and making conversation.

Get out there!
This is the fun part. You’re not going to find the ‘one’ hidden behind your sofa or lurking sheepishly at the back of your wardrobe.  If you want to find him/her you need to put yourself out there and mingle, mingle, mingle. That means accepting every invitation to a party or social gathering you get, cultivating new friendships and widening your social circle as much as possible. Get to know friends of friends, make new acquaintances and re-connect with old friends you’ve lost touch with. Allow others to set you up on blind dates. There’s no rule against having fun in your serious quest for the ‘one’.

Get involved
The new year is a great time to learn a new skill or take-up a new hobby. By enrolling in a  new activity, not only will you discover the joys of learning something new, but you’ll also meet a whole new group of people. The best kind of activities are things like ballroom dancing where you’re forced to dance with different partners over the course of a lesson and socialize afterwards. But if dancing isn’t your thing, there are plenty of other fun activities out there. Check listings in your local area and look out for free trials and taster class offers so you can try before you committing to a whole course. And if you’re nervous about going along, why not recruit a friend too? Just remember that you’re there to meet new folk not to chat to your mate.

Take control
Dating is a numbers game and you may have to kiss a few frogs before finding your prince or princess. But the more people you meet, the more chance you have of finding that special one. Meeting people online is now the third most popular way of finding a mate in the UK. And what’s more January is the busiest time of year for online dating sites, so you’d be mad not to capitalize on those all those potential partners. If you only make one new year’s resolution this year, it should be to sign-up and start searching for eligible matches. Carpe diem! Seize the day.  Do it right now!


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