Code of Conduct
- Only send messages to people you are interested in getting to know
- Be friendly and kind to others
- Keep dialogue on the dating website until you have built rapport
- Be yourself - imperfections and all
- Report any concerns to our moderators
- Respect others' opinions and decisions
- Consult our Customer Care team for advice
- Don't 'spam' a number of people with the same message
- Don't be rude, lewd or offensive
- Don't exchange contact details on a dating site until you're ready to meet
- Don't use fake, outdated or modified photos
- Don't stand for abuse
- Don't provoke or harass people
- Don't respond harshly to rejection
Dating is fun but to ensure you do it in the safest way possible we have put together some golden rules to help you get the most out of your online dating journey.
- Never give money. If someone you are communicating with on a dating site asks you for money or your bank details they are likely to be a scammer. Read more about scammers here.
If you have experienced monetary fraud on a dating site, report it to Action Fraud via their reporting tool here.
- Don't give out your number. Wait until you know someone a little better before you share your contact details. If someone asks for your number straight away, politely decline.
- Report unwarranted behaviour. If you encounter a suspicious member on a dating site or someone has been rude to you, do not hesitate to report them to the Customer Care team using the report buttons on their profile or a message. How to report someone.
- Meet in a public place. When you meet another match.com member for the first time, do it in a public place like a bar or a café. Do not go to their home and do not give them your address.
- Arrange your own transport. Don't let your date pick you up from your home on your first meeting. Check the time of the last train/bus/tube.
- Tell a friend. Inform someone you know and trust that you are going on a date and give them details of where you are going.
- Stay connected. Make sure your phone is charged before your date.
- Take action. If you have encountered an incident of a serious nature call the police straight away and report your experience to match.com on 020 305 96 494, or by email.
Our Customer Care team works hard to protect our members while keeping the site relaxed and enjoyable. To ensure that you have the safest experience, use your best judgement when dating.
"My main method of meeting someone thus far has been to know that I want to go on a date, and hope that the universe would pleasantly respond by presenting me with a tall, dark, handsome man who would love to take me out on a date and drink some red wine. Unfortunately, yet unsurprisingly, this approach hasn’t quite worked out the way I had hoped, so after a while of contemplating whether or not online dating was for me, I decided to bite the bullet and sign up to an online dating website. Then I saw match.com's free dating trial.
So there I was on Sunday with a slight hangover wondering what to do with my day, and thought that it was the perfect time to log into my online dating profile and explore what it was about and the possibilities it has to offer.
I started by filling in my dating profile, and actually found it quite hard to know what to say. I had never written a ‘personal ad’ so to speak before, apart from in my CV, and I didn’t think that details about my work experience would be enough to attract the man of my dreams on a dating website!
I firstly had a look on some people’s profiles on the dating site to see if that would spark any inspiration. I found that the ones which attracted me most to reading them were not too long, they were funny, and they told me some details about who they were and what qualities they wanted in their date. So many people had written, ‘I don’t know what to say’ or ‘I’m really new at this’ and it got a bit repetitive going through people’s dating profiles which all had the same summary. I realised that what you need to do when writing your profile is to stand out from the crowd, and so the worst thing you could do is to start your site profile like a hundred other people do!
When I was seeking inspiration from other people on match, one dating profile really caught my eye. He simply had a list of 10 funny/unique bullet points about himself. For example he said that he was 6’2, so tall enough to carry a girl on his shoulders at gigs, and that he had cooked for a famous band! This was short, to the point, and also made him sound interesting and exciting. It grabbed my attention so much, that even though I hadn’t completed my profile, I sent him a cheeky wink anyway!
But back on track again I thought I would turn to Google and the match advice site to see if there were any useful hints and tips that would help me out. I quickly realised that the dating advice online was the same as what I thought, write an attention-grabbing headline that tells people who you are, make it interesting, and also write a bit about what you are looking for.
The problem still remained however - how do I sell myself on a dating site? Do I really know what makes me interesting? Or fun? I thought that the best thing to do was to enlist the help of my friends. I asked them what they thought my best qualities were for both my looks and personality, and then tried to write something engaging and most of all a bit fun!
We came up with the short and sweet -‘Cake baker, risk-taker and fun maker! A good time girl looking to meet a fun and friendly guy. If you like to dance, drink wine, eat good food, and have adventures, then I'm your girl.’
I thought this ok, but perhaps it was a bit cheesy, and it didn’t give much personal information away or tell my potential date what I was looking for. So I tried again – ‘A bit Australian, a bit Indian, a bit African, and a bit English, I love traveling and going to new places, red wine, baking cakes and cooking spicy food. I’m easy going, love to laugh, and want to meet a fun and relaxed guy.
I studied drama at Uni and work in online marketing in London. A fun fact about me is that my parents also set up a fresh curry paste business, so I help out with that and naturally have a lifetime supply!
I like to go to the theatre, hang out at the pub, sit in coffee shops, and listen to live music. If this all sounds good to you, then I’d love to hear from you.’
I still didn’t know how good this was, and part of me was thinking that perhaps a lack of capitalised mentions of EXTREME SPORTS and WILD ADVENTURES wasn’t going to attract the attention of millions of men on a dating site. But then again, I don’t want to meet millions of men who prefer sporting holidays to the beach, think bungee jumping is fun, or love to camp in wild mountainous terrains, because all of that just isn’t me.
So now that’s all written I can move on to the rest of my profile, and in all honesty, even if my summary isn’t perfect, I can safely conclude that joining a dating website and having a go is a whole lot better than hoping the universe will be kind enough to send a tall, handsome man to my door! Will keep you updated with how my free dating trial goes :)"
How to get the most out of a dating websiteJoining dating sites can be a daunting prospect, but get past the jitters and there's a whole wealth of fun to be had with so many singles at your fingertips! Using dating websites to get to know potential dates can be a lot less effort than hitting the bar circuit or joining a club, but it's worth putting the work in to ensure you get the most from your online dating experience. If you've signed up to our free dating trial then making the most of your three free days is even more important.
1. Your online dating profile is your selling pointDon't expect to get many emails based on your age and location alone, the dating profiles that attract the most contact have a photograph and a well-written personal ad. Choose a photo that shows you in your best light but avoid passport style photos that can look rigid and formal. Ideally your dating profile should have a range of photos which show the different sides of your character - for example one of you doing something you really enjoy such as walking on the beach, one of you out with your friends and a nice natural shot of you looking happy and relaxed.
2. Get text appealAvoid clichés in your personal ad such as ‘easy-going' or ‘equally happy going out or staying in with a DVD and a bottle of wine'. Whilst these things might be true, you'll be surprised at just how many other people say the same thing. Instead try using ‘buzz' words that stand out, like mentioning a country you've visited recently or a book you've read. If you like food mention a particular cuisine, if you have an interesting job describe it and don't be afraid to use a thesaurus to avoid unimaginative words.
3. Search, search, search on a dating site!Many online daters rely on the matches suggested to them when looking for their ideal date but it's always good to team this with a variety of your own searches. If you have a particular interest, such as heavy metal or kayaking, use the keyword search feature to pull up profiles which mention these things in the personal ad. The good thing about a thorough search is that you whittle out your non-types, so if you're looking for a rugged caveman with a penchant for jazz and camping you're more likely to find him using the search menus than by simply keeping an eye out. Dating websites allow you to be picky, so make the most out of it!
4. Don't be afraid to make the first moveIf someone you think is interesting has looked at your dating profile but hasn't sent you a message – don't give up hope! While it's still more common for the male members to be proactive on dating sites, there's nothing wrong with girls getting in there first. Send him a message, even if it's a quick one just to say hello, and chances are he'll love the confidence that comes with you making the first move. Same goes for guys, if you've winked at a girl and she hasn't winked back don't despair, write to her. Generally it's best to keep messages short and friendly to pique the other person's interest. And remember – if they don't write back, don't take it personally and certainly don't follow it up with an accusatory message, after all online dating is meant to be fun!
5. Don't let one bad dating experience get you downIt's not easy finding that person you really click with so don't get despondent if you don't fancy your date when you meet in the flesh; most online daters will meet at least one person they're not attracted to during their time on a dating website – it's totally normal. If you're worried about being stuck with a date that leaves you cold try keeping it short by meeting for coffee or lunch. And when you finally meet that one that gives you butterflies you'll know that it was definitely worth the wait!
More dating advice...
- How to ask someone on a date
- How to prepare for a date
- How to let him know you like him
- What to wear on specific dates
- The real truth about being compatible: 5 dating myths exposed
- Dealing with dating disasters
- 8 dating dos and don'ts
- Top 5 tips for first date conversation
- Overcoming trust issues
- Why women love chivalrous men
- 3 things you can learn from a bad date
- 3 ways to guarantee your first date goes smoothly
- Dating on a diet
- Dating on a shoestring
- 5 ways to get the most out of a dating website
- What do you want out of your dating experience?
- 3 key things to consider when choosing a dating website
- How to sell yourself on a dating website
- The 5 pieces of dating advice you should definitely ignore
- Dates or mates: what does she see you as?