Getting back out there into the world of dating can be scary and overwhelming after a breakup. We can feel so out of tune with what we should or should not be saying, how to gauge if people are ‘into’ us or not and so on. But don’t let these things prevent you from dipping your toes back in the dating pool because it can, (and should be!) a fun and fantastic way to meet new people and even learn more about yourself!
Figure out the ‘how’s’ and ‘what’s’
There are many ways you can meet new people. Online dating is brilliant and means you can be very proactive. So spend time sprucing up your profile, choosing the best pictures, and be willing to commit some time to online dating.
Tip: Try ending your profile with a question to give people an immediate prompt if they want to message you!
I think what’s also incredibly important, is to have a clear idea on what you are looking for in a person. The sheer number of people who are online dating can be overwhelming, so you need to identify what type of person you want to be meeting. With this, I mean less of the ‘checklist type’ stuff such as height, job and looks. Yes, that is important to an extent, but what are the qualities that will make someone a great match? Is it someone with humour, adventure or someone more on the introverted side? What things will you look for in a profile that indicates these qualities?
Tip: This isn’t at all about being overly picky and I encourage you to be open minded when getting back into dating!
Spruce up your communication (and flirting!) skills
After being in a relationship and getting so used to interacting with one person, sometimes our communication skills could do with a bit of fine tuning! This isn’t about learning awful pickup lines or going completely over the top, but being able to quickly build rapport with people, flirt a little, and raise attraction through conversation, body language and subtle charm.
Tip: Go armed with a few ideas of what you can bring to the conversation, funny anecdotes are always a good icebreaker.
Be date ready
Now that you’re on the dating train, one could get scheduled any time now!
It’s wise to invest in some go-to clothing items. A lot of stress starts with not having anything to wear and going through every piece in your wardrobe to then decide you hate everything! If you can, try to be prepared and have an option for a daytime and evening date. Current wardrobe lacking in date-ready items? Perhaps it’s time to spruce up your style for this new phase of life, to give you an added confidence boost.
Tip: Keep a couple of outfits in your wardrobe that make you feel confident but most importantly are comfortable to wear.
Confidence need a boost?
I think one of the biggest challenges when it comes to dating again is feeling like we lack confidence. Often this is just internal dialogue and the confidence comes when we get back out there and start having fun. But if you really feel your confidence could do with a boost, make sure that you are doing things to aid this in your day-to-day life. So think about your nutrition, exercise and sleep as when you have these in check it shows from the outside.
Tip: Feeling good comes from when you place self-care as top priority.
I hope you find these tips helpful and are excited to get dating, meeting some new people and most importantly, having fun with it!