How to Get a Guy to Kiss You

Sometimes guys pick up on all of the signs that you like them but still struggle to go in for the kiss. They’re worried about being rejected or fear that they’ve misread the signs. Sometimes, they’re desperate to go in for the kiss but just haven’t found the right moment.

So, if you want things to progress, you need to create that moment for them.

The Psychology Behind Wanting a Kiss

The first kiss is often memorable and always important. It’s a transition moment, the point at which you express your feelings for one another and make it clear that you’re both interested.

The signs that someone is ready for a kiss are usually intentional, and we’ll get to those shortly. But there may also be some subconscious signs that the other person is interested and the time is right, such as:

• Making an effort to get close to you.
• Finding excuses to touch you, even if it’s just a brush of your hand.
• Holding eye contact and giving you a genuine smile.

Preparing the Battlefield of Love

If you’re planning a date and know you’ll be chasing a kiss at the end of it, it helps to set the scene. Prepare him by preparing yourself.

Essential Elements of Irresistible Charm

A smile and a good smell are essential if you want him to kiss you. Wear your best perfume, get close, and smile. Don’t forget to make eye contact. It’ll show him that you’re attentive and may encourage him to lean in for a kiss.

Lip Appeal: How to Keep Your Lips Kiss-Ready

Even if he is shy, he’s much more likely to go in for the kiss if you have kissable lips. So, refrain from licking them throughout the night as it will dry them out. Take some lip balm with you and keep them moist. If you whip out the lip balm toward the end of the night, he might even take the hint.

Setting the Scene for Romance

It helps to meet somewhere quiet without a lot of people. If he’s shy, he might feel more awkward kissing you when others are watching, so invite him to a quiet restaurant or for a meal at your home. It should be somewhere without any distractions getting in the way.

The Art of Suggestion

The scene is set, the date has gone well, and you’re ready for him to kiss you. From here, it’s all in the body language.

The Power of Eye Contact and Mirrored Gestures

Mirroring is when you mimic the actions of the other person, such as stroking your hair at the same time or leaning forward. It occurs subconsciously and indicates attraction, so pay attention to his body language and see if he’s mirroring you. You can also mirror his movements to let him know. Better still, while playing with your hair doesn’t necessarily indicate attraction, many people think it does, and that could include your date. So, mirror, smile, make eye contact, and make it clear you’re interested.

Encourage Closeness

You need to be close enough for him to kiss you. The more effort required, the less chance he’ll give you an impulsive, passionate kiss.

Subtle Touches that Speak Volumes

A brush of the arm or a touch of the hand can create a connection that lets him know you’re interested. If he’s not very tactile, do the work for him. Place your hands in his, giving him the chance to pull you closer and kiss you.

Building Tension Through Anticipation

Now that you’re close and touching, it’s time to give him the final sign. Look deep into his eyes, glance down at his lips, then look into his eyes again. It’s a cliched move seen in countless romcoms, but it’s also how many first kisses are instigated in real life. Assuming he’s paying attention, he’ll know you’re ready for a kiss and should make his move.

What to Say and When to Say It

You’ve done the work but he still hasn’t kissed you—what’s a girl to do?

Well, you have a couple of options. The first is just to ask him to kiss you. It’s forward, but sometimes that’s what shy guys need. He might be so worried about getting rejected that he ignores all of the subtle cues and needs a big sign that says “kiss me now”. You can also initiate the kiss yourself. Either lean in close and wait for him to do the rest of the work, or just kiss him.

What to Do if He Hesitates

He didn’t read the signs, you went in for a kiss, and he hesitated, creating an awkward moment for both of you. Now what?

Well, he might just be shy and anxious, so stay close, and if he’s interested he could go back in for a kiss. Alternatively, pull back and ask him if it’s okay for you to kiss him. You can usually avoid these issues by paying close attention to his body language throughout the date and discovering whether he likes you or not. If you had the perfect first date and he clearly liked you, it might just be nerves. If the date was terrible and he was standoffish, he’s probably not interested.

Post-Kiss Etiquette and Reflection

The first kiss is such a big deal that you spend all of the date thinking about it and then feel your anxieties melt away when it finally happens. You did it. It was great. But what happens now? You didn’t plan for this and now you’re just awkwardly staring at each other and occasionally giggling.

After a Good Kiss

If the kiss was good then you have nothing to worry about. You clearly work well together, otherwise you wouldn’t have been so eager for them to kiss you, and a good kiss suggests there is a spark.

The next step is to decide on where you want the relationship to go. In the immediate aftermath, it could be asking him if he would like a nightcap. It could mean telling him you had fun and would love to do it again sometime, prompting him to enquire about a second date.

If it was a first date, the world is your oyster. You’re still single. You’re still free. You can arrange to date other people and compare them or you can get closer to that person and become exclusive with them.

After a Bad Kiss

A bad kiss is not the end of the world. Sure, you probably don’t want to be with someone who is a terrible kisser, but you don’t know that for a fact. You can’t judge someone’s kissing ability or even your compatibility based on the first kiss. They were probably anxious. They might have licked their lips a lot in preparation, only for them to end up dry and cracked. Anxiety or alcohol could have made their mouth dry too.

Base your decisions on the date and not the kiss. If you really liked him, arrange another date, and try again. You got the first kiss out of the way, so he should be less anxious about the next one.

You can also just kiss him again on the night, letting him go for a second round and a second chance at impressing you.

Conclusion: Embracing Every Outcome

Remember, to encourage a guy to kiss you, you should:

Whatever happens during that first kiss, embrace it! As we said, it’s always a memorable experience, even if it’s an unpleasant one that skews your perception of that person.

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