By Jane Hoskyn
Most of us stumble through our love lives making the same mistakes over and over again. Why? Is it just the way life goes? Actually it could be because we keep dating the wrong types of men.
Take our quiz to find out which type of man you tend to target, and why a change might do you good.
1. You’re browsing the profiles on a dating website. Other than the photo, what makes you decide to email a guy?
a. Don’t be daft. It’s always about the photo.
b. He seems up for a laugh.
c. He’s smart, polite and prefers Jeremy Paxman to Jeremy Clarkson.
d. He says he’s looking for a long-term relationship and possibly marriage.
2. What’s your idea of a great first date?
a. Seeing the latest cool band, all of whom are his friends.
b. Beer and snogging on the top deck of the night bus.
c. Wine tasting, followed by dinner at an all-night Japanese place he knows.
d. A marriage proposal before last orders.
3. You’re most likely to go off him when you discover that…
a. Your friends don’t fancy him.
b. He’s got a mortgage.
c. He still lives with his parents.
d. He doesn’t want kids.
4. He invites you to his dad’s birthday party. You…
a. Hope that he whisks you off to a more glamorous venue after an hour or so.
b. Are snogging drunkenly in his dad’s fishpond by 9pm.
c. Are impressed that his dad’s still alive.
d. Immediately get online to order a gift box of Taylor’s Port for your potential father-in-law.
5. You’re at a restaurant together, and your meal arrives cold. What do you expect him to do about it?
a. Charm the waitress into sorting it out. She may be bewitched, but you’ll be the one getting down and dirty with him later. Ha.
b. Grab your hand and run away without paying.
c. Take you back to his place and cook you a fantastic supper.
d. Politely ask the waiter for a replacement.
6. You’re at a party with a man, and things are falling flat in the early hours. How would you like him to lift the mood?
a. Find an acoustic guitar and starts jamming. Soon everyone’s joining in.
b. Nip to the all-night off-licence, make a punch and get everyone slaughtered.
c. Take you home for a foot-rub and a glass of seriously good wine.
d. Round everyone up for a keepy-uppy tournament in the garden. At 2am.
7. What would be your ideal birthday present?
a. A party for all your friends, who have to sit there lusting after the man you’re sleeping with.
b. A dirty weekend in a B&B.
c. Dinner and tickets to the opera.
d. A diamond ring.
8. Where do you see yourself in 10 years’ time?
a. Still pulling the hottest bloke in the room.
b. Backpacking round the world.
c. Spending every winter at your holiday place in France.
d. With your man and your gorgeous kids.
9. Being dumped…
a. Never gets any easier. But you always move on eventually.
b. Sometimes comes as a relief. Men are lovely but they always need looking after, and they can be exhausting.
c. Should always be done with tact and grace.
d. Is the worst thing that ever happened to you.
10. You’re out together when you bump into your man’s ex. How does he react?
a. He’s embarrassed and spirits you away as quickly as possible, reassuring you that you’re the only woman for him.
b. By hiding and hoping that she hasn’t seen him.
c. With a big hug and kiss, and some friendly questions about how she’s doing these days.
d. With a brisk hello. He seems rattled and doesn’t meet her eye.
What your answers mean…
Mostly A: You’re addicted to heartbreakers
You don’t want a partner, you want a trophy. The trouble with trophy men is that other women want them, too – and the men are only too happy to oblige. Their magnetic popularity makes you feel smug one moment and dumped the next. Ditch your trophy habit and find your self-respect. Learn to look beyond men’s most obvious charms, and you might just find a guy who’ll never break your heart.
Mostly B: Your type will never grow up
You have a thing for fun-loving young boyfriends who make you laugh, show you a great time and keep you feeling young. On the downside, these manchildren are immune to responsibility and unable to get up in the morning, let alone make the bed. Their immaturity usually ends up driving you insane, so you dump them – only to fall for more of the same Do yourself a favour and try an older man next time. Being wined and dined really isn’t so bad.
Mostly C: You like ‘em older and wiser
You know exactly what Catherine Zeta Jones sees in Michael Douglas. You want a man who’s emotionally intelligent, financially secure and infinitely more reliable than some moron takes his laundry home to Mum. However, tread carefully. A successful older man can be very seductive (not least in bed), but don’t sacrifice your sense of self. Make sure that he knows you’re his equal, because being controlled is no fun.
Mostly D: You want a family man
Your type of man isn’t interested in late nights with the boys, or in eyeing up the waitress who brings you dinner on your first date. He wants you, and he wants you for life. You are impressed by his unashamed desire to settle down with you, and his public displays of affection make you feel loved and secure. However, be careful not to get too comfy too quickly. Don’t be in such a hurry for marriage and kids that you forget to enjoy your freedom.