There’s so many stereotypes about men and their sexuality. There are some pervasive beliefs about male sexuality that are all too familiar:
- Men only have one thing on their minds
- Men lust; women want to feel desired
- What’s one word that turns every man on: Hello
The idea that men are solely seeking sexual thrills is a prejudice! There’s ways to stimulate men, both physically and mentally to turn them on. So, without further ado, here’s our top ten turn ons for men:
1. Feeling desired
Men want to feel wanted too! Making a guy feel desired, not just sexually but emotionally is 101 how to turn men on.
- Tell him you like having him around
- Kiss him first
- Say “I saw this and thought of you”
Perfume and sweat are both sexy (but in completely different ways). Whether you’re spraying it on or going to the gym beforehand, smell stimulates that part of the olfactory system that affects emotions, memory and creativity. It helps him remember you and associate your specific scent with sexy feelings.
3. Emotional connection
In a recent study, 53% of men affirmed that to become sexually aroused, they had to feel an emotional connection to the person they’re dating. Laughing, talking and taking the time to establish a connection provides more of a long term turn on than simply seduction.
- Make him dinner and romance him a little
- If he is a little down, tell him a bad joke (or a good one, if you have one!)
- Be interested in what he does, validation is important
4. Responsive vs. spontaneous
Men describe their desire as mostly ‘responsive’ in studies and tests – just like women! It’s more likely that men experience sexual advances in homosexual relationships as opposed to heterosexual ones. So, if you’re a woman who dates men, try making the first move sexually.
- Initiate sex
- Lean in and kiss him unexpectedly
- Tell him you want him
5. Ask him out
Plan a date and ask him out, it’s not only you taking the initiative but it’s nice to take some of the pressure off him and do something you both enjoy together. Asserting your independence by showing you can plan and you listen to him when he says what he likes is a huge turn on! Reignite that spark of first dating and ask him out somewhere – or don’t tell him where you’re going and just surprise him with something he loves!
Not too hard! Keep it light and fun. Biting is a great way to stimulate a man. Nibbling on the neck or ear is perfect, the aim isn’t to hurt, but rather to light a little extra unexpected passion in your dating life.
7. Wearing (but not stealing) his clothes
Okay, before you envision yourself wearing his oversized gym shorts awkwardly, here’s what we mean – wear a piece of his clothing, like one of his button-down shirts, in sexy ways. It says to him you’re proud to be with him, and allows the smell of you to stay on one of his pieces of clothing. So put on his dress shirt and walk around the house. Or maybe one of his t-shirts that just barely covers your bum – and bonus points if you haven’t got anything on underneath!
8. Unexpected opportunities
In a recent study, two-thirds of the men surveyed (66%) said they turned lusty when their partner presented sexual prospects that were unanticipated.
Many of the men said their sex was usually scheduled in advance. This is what sex therapists almost universally recommend for long-term couples, especially those with significant desire differences. But the men said occasional spontaneity got them excited, particularly when their partner initiated it.
- Kiss him on the neck from behind
- Sit on a high-up flat surface and pull him towards you
Don’t be shy! Allow yourself to get into it and make some noise when you’re making love. Let your man know that you’re enjoying what’s going on.
There’s nothing worse than someone being quiet during sex – because men want to know they’re doing a good job for you and making you feel amazing!
It’s not just for sexy times either, the sound of laughter is a huge turn on for men too. Giving a little giggle at his joke or full on belly laughing at a funny story he’s telling is sexy.
What do all of these turn ons have in common? Confidence! The best thing about dating is when you feel sexy and desirable and want your partner to feel the same. Be confident, love yourself and invite the special person in your life to feel the same way about themselves. Dating is about growing together, so be confident, because there’s nothing sexier.