Dating tips3 minutes

Step 5: Discover who you’re really looking for

Laura, 13 July 2021
Step 5: Discover who you're really looking for

Finding the right person to date might seem like a simple matter of creating a checklist and finding out who ‘ticks the right boxes’.
But, what we’ve learned from our years of experience at match.com is that finding a love match is less about narrowing your search and more about being open to new experiences. Here are our top tips to help you keep an open mind and discover who you’re really looking for.

Let people know who YOU are

The first step to discovering what you’re looking for is giving a clear and honest description of yourself on your profile. Offering a genuine reflection of your character, lifestyle and interests makes it much, much easier for the right type of person to find you.

Conveying your true self

You’re a wonderfully unique and complex human being, so how do you let people know who you really are?
Make sure your profile doesn’t sound like everyone else’s. Rather than using stock phrases like ‘good sense of humour’, aim to convey more of yourself by describing something that makes you laugh, or recounting an amusing anecdote which reveals more about you.

Show your personality

We all know that pictures are the first thing people look at, but it’s wise to think further than just trying to look good. Pictures are also a vital part of showing your personality. Step 4 described how to choose your perfect profile picture, but including additional pictures which display your lifestyle and interests, likes and dislikes and will give match members another chance to get to know the real ‘you’.

Keep your options open

Think you’ve sussed your ‘type’? Think again. Remember – you’re writing your profile so that you can go on some great dates and meet people in person.
You might have a picture of the kind of partner that would be perfect for you, but if you’ve thought it through, right down to their eye colour, exact height and star-sign, perhaps it’s time to widen the net a little.
While it’s great to be specific about who you are, it’s better not to be so specific about what you want. Don’t go into too much detail or you’ll not only rule out huge numbers of people, but you might also miss out on someone who could be perfect for you.

Keep your non-negotiables to a minimum

Don’t forget that some of the people reading your advert might be adorable but shy, so don’t scare them away with a long list of must-haves!
If you do have non-negotiables, such as a certain radius of where you live, that’s fine, but keep them to your search criteria, and don’t be afraid to go outside your comfort zone a little.

Enjoy the journey

If you’re having fun meeting people online then it’s sure to show. Think of your search as a fun and uplifting experience and you’ll be much more likely to attract the upbeat, uplifting personality to bring that sparkling ray of sunshine into your world.

Read the other articles in our ’10 steps’ series:
Step 1: Why you should try online dating
Step 2: Why you should choose match.com
Step 3: Tips for writing your online dating profile
Step 4: How to choose the perfect profile picture
Step 6: How to find your match
Step 7: Getting in touch with your matches
Step 8: How to respond to your first message
Step 9: Where to go on your first date together
Step 10: The first date survival guide

1.6M people have already met their partner on Match.* Could you be next? Start now your own story!