How to date without losing mates

Don’t lose old friends over new love

Just because you’re enjoying the first flush of love with a new partner, don’t forget the friends who’ve been there to pick up the pieces when it’s all gone wrong in the past. Here are our tips to keep your mates while you date

Mate night
You’ve heard of date night, so why not create mate night? Choose a day every week to catch up with your pals, either for drinks out or a long phone call. This way they’ll know you still want to hang out with them as well as the new love in your life.

Surprise, surprise
You can be spontaneous with your friends too. So why not break out of your 2-4-1 pizza voucher habit and try out an open-air gig or poetry slam instead? It’ll mean you can have a laugh together rather than just a catch-up, and may help your single pals meet someone if they feel like they’re missing out.

Discreet treat
If you and your pals used to have a scream discussing the nitty-gritty of your overnight encounters, then they might feel left out when you start to clam up. Of course, if things are getting serious with your new love you’ll want to be discreet, but the odd bit of sauce will keep your friends ticking over, especially if they are sworn to secrecy.

Confide in me
You’re beginning to open up more to your new partner and this inevitably means you have less need to confide in your gal pals. You don’t need to share chapter and verse on every issue with them any more, but don’t forget all the good advice they’ve given you in the past and continue to turn to them as well as your partner for help and support.

We’re in this together
While your friends will appreciate precious time with you alone, don’t let an ‘us and them’ situation occur by keeping your partner away from the gang. The more your friends get to know your partner, the easier it will be for you to spend time with them all together.

Listen up
If your friends take a dislike to your new love, don’t automatically assume it’s because they resent you being in a relationship. Take time to hear their concerns, and then think it over. If you think they’ve got a point then don’t turn a blind eye to their concerns for the sake of having a partner. And if you don’t agree, then tell them why and give them a chance to realise they’ve misunderstood the situation.