If you’re dating you might have noticed a sudden influx of advice and words of wisdom. Everyone from your mum to your great aunt will have something to say about how you should behave and what you should say.
But while they might think they know best, they could actually be doing your dating and relationships more harm than good, so it’s best to take some of their tips with a pinch of salt and do what feels right to you. Here are our top 5 pieces of dating advice you should definitely ignore.
1. Never accept last minute date invites
It’s Monday afternoon and you’re lethargically sat at your desk when the person you’ve been dating texts to ask if you’d like to do something that evening.
At first, you’re jittery with excitement and butterflies. You have no plans tonight (and no – two episodes of Coronation Street with EastEnders in-between doesn’t count!) but your friends’ words start to creep into your head, “play hard to get”, “don’t seem too available”.
While you want to show your date that you have an action-packed life filled with your hobbies and socialising with friends, declining last-minute date invites on this basis could lead to you missing out on the rush of a spontaneous and potentially unforgettable date.
If you’re genuinely free (the soaps can be recorded!) and fancy meeting up, don’t over-analyse, just go for it!
2. Don’t call for three days
You had an amazing night. You learnt and laughed lots and you were genuinely intrigued by your date. You’d love nothing more than to see them again – soon! But you can’t possibly text them to tell them all that, can you? At least not before a certain amount of time has passed. Of course you can. Besides, according to a recent LoveGeist survey, the three-day rule is a thing of the past, since 78% of men reach out to their date well before the 72 hours has lapsed.
If you’re worried that a text to say “thank you for a brilliant evening, I had a lot of fun” runs the risk of ruining everything then you need to stop a second and think about it – you’re just being polite. Plus, it shows that you had a lovely time and that you’re interested. If your date feels the same, they’ll reply. It’s as simple as that.
3. Don’t order a big meal
You’ve just seen what the table next to you ordered and boy does that steak look good! As your finger frantically traces the menu for the exact same dish you skim over healthy sections and remember where you are and how you think you should act, so you ask for the “Superfood Salad with skinless chicken” – snore!
If you’re salivating at the thought of steak then order it – and heck – add extra fries if you like!
While you shouldn’t reveal everything about yourself on a first date, equally you shouldn’t feel the need to act in a different way. Be yourself – you want your date to like you for who you are, not who you can act like.
4. He should pay for the first date
While it might have been the ‘done thing’ in your mum’s day, expecting the man to pay for the first date almost feels a little presumptuous nowadays. After all, would you leave your purse at home if you were going for dinner with friends?
A lot of men like to foot the first bill as it’s chivalrous. So, if he insists on paying, of course be grateful and offer to pay for your next rendezvous.
5. Wait for your date to make the first move
Letting the man do all the chasing and organising might seem romantic, but quite frankly, it’s old fashioned.
While courting isn’t necessarily a thing of the past, it’s good to approach dating with a fresh and open mind.
If you’d like to meet someone you’ve been speaking to online or you’re keen to go on a second date with them – ask. That’s one thing our mothers are right about, “if you don’t ask then you’ll never know” – so go for it!